Parashat HaShavua - VaYera
As one reads Parashat VaYera, there is every reason to believe that Avraham will complete the task that God has commanded, to sacrifice Yitzchak. Step by step he reaches the moment of truth: “Avraham sent forth his hand and took the knife, to slaughter his son / וַיִּשְׁלַ֤ח אַבְרָהָם֙ אֶת־יָד֔וֹ וַיִּקַּ֖ח אֶת־הַמַּֽאֲכֶ֑לֶת לִשְׁחֹ֖ט אֶת־בְּנֽוֹ.” (Gen. 22:10) And then, at the last second:
וַיִּקְרָ֨א אֵלָ֜יו מַלְאַ֤ךְ יְהֹוָה֙ מִן־הַשָּׁמַ֔יִם וַיֹּ֖אמֶר אַבְרָהָ֣ם | אַבְרָהָ֑ם וַיֹּ֖אמֶר הִנֵּֽנִי: וַיֹּ֗אמֶר אַל־תִּשְׁלַ֤ח יָֽדְךָ֙ אֶל־הַנַּ֔עַר וְאַל־תַּ֥עַשׂ ל֖וֹ מְא֑וּמָה
“An angel of God called to him from heaven and said, ‘Avraham! Avraham!’ He said, ‘Here I am.’ He said, ‘Do not stretch forth your hand to the lad, nor do any harm to him.’” (Gen. 22:11-12)
But: should this come as a surprise? After all, just one chapter ago, an angel came to the rescue of Avraham's older child Yishmael. Hagar had given up hope that Yishmael, the son she had with Avraham, would survive being sent into the wilderness by Sarah and Avraham. She left him beneath a bush, moved away and cried; she couldn't bear watching him die. (Gen. 21:16) Though we are not explicitly told that Yishmael also cries, the Torah tells us that “God heard the boy's voice, and an angel of God called to Hagar from heaven, and said to her, ‘What is your concern, Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the boy's voice where he is’ / וַיִּשְׁמַ֣ע אֱלֹהִים֘ אֶת־ק֣וֹל הַנַּ֒עַר֒ וַיִּקְרָא֩ מַלְאַ֨ךְ אֱלֹהִ֤ים | אֶל־הָגָר֙ מִן־הַשָּׁמַ֔יִם וַיֹּ֥אמֶר לָ֖הּ מַה־לָּ֣ךְ הָגָ֑ר אַל־תִּ֣ירְאִ֔י כִּֽי־שָׁמַ֧ע אֱלֹהִ֛ים אֶל־ק֥וֹל הַנַּ֖עַר בַּֽאֲשֶׁ֥ר הוּא־שָֽׁם.” (Gen. 21:17)
One notices that the actions of Sarah towards Hagar and Yishmael, and the complicity of Avraham, leads into a similar situation for Avraham and Sarah. They sent out Hagar and Yishmael to a fate unknown – with God’s affirmation – and then God sent out Avraham to an unspecified place to sacrifice Yitzchak. Hagar cannot bear to be present for the near-death of Yishmael, and Sarah is not present for the near-death of Yitzchak.
And, perhaps most significantly, both children are saved by angels. In the case of Hagar and Yishmael, one could understand if Hagar were not so quick to believe the angel that tells her God “will make [Yishmael] into a great nation / כִּֽי־לְג֥וֹי גָּד֖וֹל אֲשִׂימֶֽנּוּ.” (Gen. 21:18) After all, the last time an angel came to Hagar, she had run away from Sarai’s mistreatment of her while pregnant. The angel’s response? “Return to your mistress, and allow yourself to be afflicted by her / שׁ֖וּבִי אֶל־גְּבִרְתֵּ֑ךְ וְהִתְעַנִּ֖י תַּ֥חַת יָדֶֽיהָ.” (Gen. 16:9) Her son would be strong, she is promised, and his offspring abundant, but why allow the affliction? And so to convince Hagar this second time that she could rely on the angel, relief is provided immediately: “God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water / וַיִּפְקַ֤ח אֱלֹהִים֙ אֶת־עֵינֶ֔יהָ וַתֵּ֖רֶא בְּאֵ֣ר מָ֑יִם.” (Gen. 21:19)
The saving of Yitzchak also is not done through angelic words alone. One can imagine that when Hagar returned that first time to suffer more, Avraham might have heard from her that angelic salvation can be underwhelming; maybe he too needed more convincing before stopping short of his divine mission. And so, echoing the story of Hagar and Yishmael, “Avraham lifted up his eyes, and he saw, and behold there was a ram caught behind in a tree by its horns; Avraham went and took the ram and offered it up as a burnt offering instead of his son / וַיִּשָּׂ֨א אַבְרָהָ֜ם אֶת־עֵינָ֗יו וַיַּרְא֙ וְהִנֵּה־אַ֔יִל אַחַ֕ר נֶֽאֱחַ֥ז בַּסְּבַ֖ךְ בְּקַרְנָ֑יו וַיֵּ֤לֶךְ אַבְרָהָם֙ וַיִּקַּ֣ח אֶת־הָאַ֔יִל וַיַּֽעֲלֵ֥הוּ לְעֹלָ֖ה תַּ֥חַת בְּנֽוֹ.” (Gen 22:13) Again, immediate and tangible relief.
At the same time, though, there is also a sad difference between these episodes in their impact on parent-child relationships. When God saves Yishmael, Hagar is told, “Rise, pick up the lad and grasp your hand in him / וּמִי שְׂאִ֣י אֶת־הַנַּ֔עַר וְהַֽחֲזִ֥יקִי אֶת־יָדֵ֖ךְ בּ֑וֹ.” (Gen. 22:18) Soon thereafter we are told that she chooses a wife for Yishmael. (Gen. 21:21) By contrast, after Avraham offers a substitute sacrifice for his son, “Avraham returned to his young men, and they arose and went together to Beersheva; and Avraham remained in Beersheva / וַיָּ֤שָׁב אַבְרָהָם֙ אֶל־נְעָרָ֔יו וַיָּקֻ֛מוּ וַיֵּֽלְכ֥וּ .יַחְדָּ֖ו אֶל־בְּאֵ֣ר שָׁ֑בַע וַיֵּ֥שֶׁב אַבְרָהָ֖ם בִּבְאֵ֥ר שָֽׁבַע” (Gen. 22:19) No Yitzchak. And Avraham does not find a wife for Yitzchak himself but instead has his servant do so. (Gen. 24)
In other words, Avraham, a model for us in so many important ways, also presents a cautionary tale of parenting. In her beautiful song “Avraham” (the original 2013 version), Daniela Spector powerfully captures this sentiment, making a plea to Avraham and perhaps all parents. She sings:
Avraham
don't touch this child
he doesn't belong
you don't see
there's no time
don't be captive to
a pillar of smoke
an old story
wake up
אברהם
אל תגע בילד הזה
הוא לא שייך
אתה לא רואה
אין זמן
אל תלך שבי אחרי
עמוד עשן
סיפור ישן
תתעורר
Always
seek the hidden path
to return home.
You fight,
working every day and trying
to get by
with what is and the pain
that doesn't pass.
You will fight on
Avraham
לעולם
תחפש אחרי השביל הנעלם
לחזור הביתה
אתה נלחם
עובד כל יום ומשתדל להסתדר
עם מה שיש והכאב
שלא עובר
אתה נלחם עוד
אברהם
May we be blessed with angels who protect us and our children – especially our children – and in our parenting and our lives more generally, not get lost in pillars of smoke or old stories; may we instead always find ourselves seeking or already upon those paths that keep us deeply connected with family and community.
Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Jack Nahmod
Middle School Judaic Studies Head
Rabbinic Advisor
